I wish I were one of those people who enjoyed being pregnant, I truly do. When I am not pregnant I swear that the next time I am, you will see me living in the moment and taking what comes and enjoying what is happening. When I am pregnant, I realize that is a lot of crap from myself. I do not enjoy the stuff that comes at week 10.
I blog about this with a lot of guilt. The small voice inside my head reminds me that I am lucky to be in this position, that there are people who can’t get pregnant (having taken 2 years to get pregnant with Ivy, I have been there). I can get pregnant, I should enjoy it, I should take it all in, especially considering this is the last time. (I can say that very confidently.) But I can’t. I just don’t feel very sunny during this time, and that is hard for me.
Owen informed me yesterday that our house is always a mess. He is right, I barely lift a finger. The kids fed themselves the other day because EVERYTHING they eat makes me throw up. They got themselves granola bars, pudding, chips, sandwiches, and chocolate. They ran around naked later that same day. Every child’s dream day.
I strongly dislike taking the Zofran. What if it isn’t as safe as they all think? But I know, throwing up everything that goes in has it risks, so I will take the medicine as needed so that I can be a partially functioning member of society.
I ate crackers, sour gummy worms and a nectarine yesterday.
And with the sour tone to my post, I will end by acknowledging that I know people have it worse than me, in the past the sickness has subsided by about week 20. I know there are those who are sick till the end. I am not saying my life is worse than theirs, I am just saying that I like to do the things I do and feel the way I like feeling. A blip in the system throws me for a loop and I just don’t do well with it.
Well, 1/4 of the way done and here is to hoping that I feel better and the sunny feelings return to my spirit soon!
3 comments:
Sweet Jen,
My heart and prayers are with you! I am grateful that you take this challenge and bring these beautiful children into the world - you are AMAZING!! Don't ever sell yourself short - you are doing a wonderful thing and you are part of a miracle. The only thing I can suggest are papaya pills - these were amazing nausea busting natural wonders when I couldn't take prescriptions and my stomach was topsy turvy. There is no medicine in these they are 100% natural. I know how you love natural remedies and foods. As I said before I'm praying for you!
Love you so much!
Aunt Cathy
So sorry to hear you are feeling so crummy. When I was pregnant, I needed bendectin (now off the market) and I don't what I would have done without it! Try not to worry too much about the Zofran, but I know that is easier said than done. Take each day at a time. I hope things ease up a bit. It will be worth it when you hold your beautiful new baby in your arms.
I took Zofran when I had to take pain pills for my knee surgery - they are wonderful little pills. Trust your doctor. I took Bendectin for nausea like Kathi - then they pulled it off the market, but it didn't seem to hurt your cute husband any or any of the other kids. I hate being nauseated so I'm feeling for you. You are always in my prayers.
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