Almost my Breaking Point

You know that point where you are sure you are going to go insane? I am exactly seconds from getting there.  It has just been too much today. 

It started when we were running late for school today which in turn leaves us running late for Kindermusik.  The late start was a result of Ivy snoozing away at 8:30 despite the fact that we have to leave at 8:35.  I always want to wake her up sooner, but I never know what I am going to get.  If I wake her up before I am ready for the day and before I get Autumn ready for the day, and it is a day when she is not ready to get up, I can kiss my dry hair and makeup goodbye.  So, I did what I usually do and I woke her up at 8:30 after I put Owen and Autumn in the car.  I can’t get ready very easily when I have to carry Autumn around all day so we are rushed from the beginning..  I threw her in some clothes, finger combed her hair, grabbed a granola bar and some fruit snacks for breakfast and headed out to the car.  Once I was in the car I begged and pleaded with her to get in her seat.  One fine day she decided she needed her seat in the back of the van and she gets herself in BUT it takes forever.  First she has to go see the baby and say hi, then she has to climb in her seat and then get out, then she usually picks up something off the floor.  I beg and I plead some more and then I slowly start to back down the driveway and tell her I just have to choice but to go and get a ticket from a policeman for her not being in her seat.  That usually works.  The worst part of this ritual is that I have to do it before we head off to school and then again after we take Owen in.  Curse the drop off procedures at his school. 

Once we finally drove away from school we went to her music class.  We were late because after I unhook Ivy from her seat, she needs a drink of water, needs to put on her shoes that never stay on while we drive, needs her coat on, needs it zipped up, needs to find a toy from the car to bring in and needs to get out of the car herself and needs to close the door herself.  This, by the way, also happens while we drop off Owen at school.  It is AMAZING actually that we make it anywhere.  In fact, this ritual of getting in and out happens every time we go anywhere.  Tiring, I tell you. 

We were late for school, late for music class, and late getting Owen from school.  (and yes, I carried Autumn during Ivy’s music class).

Then, we couldn’t come home and rest cause our housecleaner was here so we headed to Trader Joe’s.  I carried Autumn through the store while the other kids pushed the baby carts and loaded up my groceries.  $109 of unexpected groceries later (I bought them all kinds of things they wanted that we didn’t need), I carried Autumn and two really heavy bags out to the car.  Owen really wanted to try his new peanut butter filled pretzels.  I said, “let me get them for you because somehow you always seem to spill everything.”.  I gave him two, and climbed in to go.  While we were waiting endlessly for Ivy to hook herself in he wanted more.  I lost my mind and told him he could get them himself.  Of course he spilled them over the floor.  I asked him to please pick them up and mentioned that we would clean the car when we got home before we headed off to his music class. 

I thought it was a simple request and we pulled in the driveway ready to clean, at least I was.  I asked him to please grab the garbage from the back.  Then his six-year-old self took over and he started whining that he didn’t want to and it wasn’t fair and why did he have to help.  I said he didn’t and to please refrain from asking me for things for the rest of the day if he was not willing to do things for me.  He stomped inside leaving Ivy and I to do the work. 

I came inside to find him lying on the couch watching a show.  That made me mad.  I asked him nicely to turn off the tv.  This made him mad and he started stomping around screaming at me.  He at one point told me that Kiki was way nicer than me.  I went back outside, he stuck his head out the door and yelled, “I HATE….” and slammed the door.  That was a close one.  (Although I wasn’t too mad at that, 1. I used to say that to my mom all the time, it was dramatic and 2. I felt the words, “you are being such an ass”, want to come flying out of my mouth to him the other day.  I held back too, PHEW.). 

He decided he would help once I forbid the tv the rest of the day and he tried really hard to be nice.  Having kids is a good lesson in putting things behind you.  He wanted to move on but I wasn’t quite ready, yet it sucks to be sitting there pouting when he is trying to tell me about his day.

Then to music class, which I held Autumn the whole time. 

Then to T-ball practice in the freezing cold, which I held Autumn the whole time (and we were late for).

Then back home for dinner.  Greg said goodbye as he went off to bootcamp and to head to my dad’s for the night to watch Felix and Robee while Kristi and my dad were out of town. That resulted in a love/hate relationship with Greg. Love that he went to stay there, hate that he went to bootcamp while I starved and held Autumn.  Then to bed to watch a movie.  Autumn finally fell asleep and then Ivy wouldn’t stop talking, screaming, fighting with Owen, and anything else she could think of to stay awake.  Then I laid down and smelled pee from the other night when Ivy peed in the bed for the first time ever (and I woke up soaking wet right along with her cause she sleeps so darn close to me).   We climbed out of the bed while saying a little prayer that Autumn would stay asleep and used baking soda and towels on the pee smell.  We climbed back in bed and Ivy started screaming for her show.  I mean SCREAMING.  I told her the tv was off and it was time to sleep.  This was at 9:15, it is now 10:23 and she just stopped screaming.  I brought her downstairs in my own fit of anger that the only way to diffuse is to go lock yourself in the bathroom, yet I couldn’t cause Autumn might wake up and want to be held.  

Speaking of, Ivy just fell asleep and Autumn is crying upstairs……it never ends.